Blu-ray review: ‘Troll 2′

In the cult film realm bad is often good. And very bad can be the stuff of legend.

Enter “Troll 2,” a cinematic stink bomb that bullied its way into the “worst films of all time” category.

The documentary “Best Worst Movie” tracks “Troll 2’s” unlikely arc, but fans can now appreciate the original in all its high-def splendor.

The Blu-ray “Troll 2″ takes little advantage of the format. The video presentation is hum drum and the only extra is the theatrical trailer. But for those who flock to “Troll 2″ viewing parties or relish hearing some of the worst dialogue ever spoken on screen, “Troll 2″ is a must buy.

“Troll 2″ follows a freckle-faced boy named Joshua (Michael Paul Stephenson) who travels with his family to the cozy hamlet of Nilbog for vacation.

Neither Joshua nor his family realize Nilbog is “goblin” spelled backward, so they’re unprepared for a town teeming with troll-like beasties.

No, the monsters aren’t referred to as trolls here, nor is the film a sequel in any real sense despite the title. It’s just two of many reasons why the film is so spectacularly lousy.

The goblins are disguised as kindly towns folk, and the only defense Joshua’s family has is the ghost of his grandfather who shows up to provide clues on how to survive.

Where does a film critic start in assessing “Troll 2?” The acting is uniformly awful, the kind of mugging you’d expect from a seventh grade production. The dialogue ranges from bad to, “how did they keep a straight face saying that?”

Some scenes need to be rewound to soak in their idiocy. Did a hormonal teen really get seduced by a woman brandishing a corn on the cob?

The goblin makeup doesn’t allow for the monsters’ mouths to move, or any other activity that could hint that the masks weren’t made of hardened plastic.

It’s hard to believe the film wasn’t designed as camp from the outset. How else can you process a moment where the hero threatens the goblins with a bologna sandwich.

“The cholesterol! The toxins!” the evil goblin witch cries.

They’re putting us on, right? Nope. It’s all played straight, and that makes the unintentional laughs into all out guffaws.

Some choice highlights for your consideration:

The teen who can’t decide between hanging out with his goofy pals or spending quality time with the adorable Holly (Connie Young).
The half-tree, half boy sequence.
The green ice cream that looks like regurgitated St. Patty’s Day beer.
Did I mention the corn on the cob seduction?

So whip up your favorite food, slather on some green icing and relish one of the best worst movies you’ll ever pop into your Blu-ray player.

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