(Guest post by Hunter Duesing)
While “Battle: Los Angeles’” shaky cam dominated the box office over the weekend, Disney’s computer-animated “Mars Needs Moms” made cinema’s hall of shame for having the tenth worst opening box office for a wide-release movie since 1982.
Budgeted at $150 million, “Mars Needs Moms” took in a ghastly $6.8 million. This has prompted pundits and studio suits alike to muse as to why audiences chose to ignore this seemingly family-friendly offering.
Based on Bloom County cartoonist Berkeley Breathed’s children’s book of the same name, “Mars Needs Moms” is about a kid named Milo whose mother is kidnapped by aliens, prompting him to rescue her and learn to appreciate her role in his life.
Sounds simple and sweet on paper, no?
The Wall Street Journal’s Speakeasy blog offered thoughts as to why “Mars Needs Moms” died so quickly. Paul Dergarabedian of Hollywood.com Box Office shared one of the standard lines of reasoning you often hear when a movie does poorly, stating there were too many animated movies crowding cinemas. Disney’s Chuck Viane had no real explanation in his statement on the matter, however it was noted that he didn’t believe a crowded market was to blame given the success of last year’s “Tangled,” which managed to find an enormous audience amid a flock of animated offerings.
It was wise of Disney not to pin this on competition, mainly because one of the movies that would be supposedly stealing business is another Disney release, the five-week-old “Gnomeo and Juliet.” Saying the movies are too crowded with like-minded fare is, more often than not, a cop-out.
Judging movies by their box office take is normally a worthless practice, as it has no real bearing on its artistic merits. I didn’t see “Mars Needs Moms” yet, and I probably never will bother watching it. Weighing in on a movie without having seen can be a waste of time, however, in this case my lack of desire highlights the problem.
I remember getting the press materials for an advance screening for “Moms” at my office. This was before I had even heard of the movie. I opened the envelope, and in my hands held a press kit for what seemed to be the ugliest animated movie I’ve ever been privy to see. I saw a horde of hideous creatures that looked like one of the presents my ex-girlfriend’s cat left on my clothes when he was trying to tell me I wasn’t welcome in his domain.
I decided to watch a trailer just in case these ugly images weren’t representative of what might be a fun film. What I saw looked like something that could only be put to use as a military tool for torture, not something meant to entertain a crowd of parents and their kids. The story no doubt has a positive message for children, but the film looked like an eyesore.
“Mars Needs Moms” might actually be an okay movie. The 40 percent it’s aggregated on Rotten Tomatoes holds little hope. Still, I can’t imagine a movie like this, looking the way it does, appealing to anyone other than movie masochists.
“Mars Needs Moms” didn’t fail because of an overcrowded marketplace, it failed because it looks like an abomination no parent would wish up on their child, and no child would subject their parent to.
Add in the inflated price of a 3D movie ticket, and you have an audience that would much rather spend its time and money on something else.
(Photo: “Mars Needs Moms,” a new 3D animated film, tanked at the box office during its opening weekend. Disney Pictures)
Hunter Duesing resides in Memphis, TN, and is the co-host of The Midnight Movie Cowboys podcast. He also covers Blu-ray and DVD releases for Parcbench.com. Visit him at midnightmoviecowboys.com or follow him on Twitter at twitter.com/jhduesing
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{ 5 comments… read them below or add one }
I should also note that there was no reason for Disney to spend $150 million on this movie. Spending that much on a movie like this seems like a completely insane business model. Just because you shove the movie in everyone’s face with your marketing budget doesn’t mean they’ll come see it, especially when you have aliens as horrifying to look at as these in your advertisements.
I loved Berkeley Breathed’s Bloom County comic strip, so I imagine the story upon which this movie is based is great. However, I had an instant reaction – revulsion – to the animation as well. Hollywood needs to realize that animation that is too close to live action, such as with The Polar Express and A Christmas Carol, is flat out creepy. Factor in the ugly aliens and it’s unwatchable.
Exactly, I’m praying that Robert Zemeckis’ obsession with mocapping humans ends very soon.
According to the Cartoon Brew website, the “Mars Needs Moms” crash has caused the cancellation of the “Yellow Submarine” mo-capture movie, which is good news, I think.
I would also credit 3D fatigue. Spending more money to have to wear those glasses is rapidly wearing out as a fun thing to do.
I think the only watchable movie (even enjoyable) filmed in Zemickis-vision is “Monster House”.
So, you’ve got previews here with creepy people who pretty much redefine “uncanny valley”, one of whom is a fat, ugly man who invents a fart machine and… I’m not surprised and even a little glad this bombed. No mas!
And isn’t the plot of “Mars Needs Mom” pretty much the same as Nickelodeon’s 2001 “Jimmy Neutron: Boy Genius” movie? That movie was actually funny and featured Patrick Stewart and Martin Short as the bad guys.