Three-dimensional filmmaking isn’t on its last legs, but the priest is mentally rehearsing his Last Rites ceremony.
It’s all Hollywood’s fault, of course. They smelled a money-making ploy and made nearly all the wrong moves until audiences recoiled at the very thought of a third dimension.
Need proof?
This year’s “Sanctum” and “Drive Angry,” both hyped as original 3-D fare, tanked at the box office. And, more recently, “Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides” and “Kung Fu Panda 2″ both underperformed in their 3D incarnations. That’s in addition to the year’s mega-flop, “Mars Needs Moms.”
Film talent is taking notice, too. Tim Burton, who helmed the 3-D smash “Alice in Wonderland,” just announced his “Dark Shadows” film won’t be a 3-D experience.
So, is the fat lady doing her vocal exercises? Not if Hollywood follows the following five tips before it’s officially too late:
- Scrap 2-D to 3-D conversions – The 2010 remake “Clash of the Titans” angered fans with its sub-par 3-D conversion. And “Titans” isn’t the only offender. No matter how much coin “Alice in Wonderland” made, its 3D effects were negligible. I kept taking off my glasses and noticing the screen looked pretty much the same.
- Stop the 3-D re-releases - Audiences will soon be seeing 3-D upgrades of former box office hits like “Star Wars” and “Titanic.” I’m all for letting modern audiences experience great films on the big screen anew, but this bald money grab will chase away film purists while attracting too few newbies. It’s a sour strategy that makes 3-D look like the gimmick many claim it is.
- Better glasses – Today’s 3-D glasses are far superior to their ’80s-era predecessors. But let’s have some fun with these spectacles. Why not open up the 3-D glasses market to companies who can sell pairs to be used over and again? Film fans can opt for comfortable, stylish models that express their personalities. A little fashion flair might go a long way. And movie theaters can charge a smaller fee for consumers who arrive with their own glasses. And speaking of prices …
- Lower prices – Charging up to $5 more for the chance to see a movie in 3-D is insanity. Lower those prices, or all the three-dimensional splendor won’t win over converts.
- Paging Mr. Cameron- Director James Cameron is the King of the 3-D World, and with good reason. His 2009 smash “Avatar” remains the best reason to embrace the format. Cameron has been vocal in his support of the medium, but now he has to go a few steps further. If he can rally his fellow directors, share some tricks of the 3-D trade and sell the technology to the public it has a better chance of sticking around.
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{ 5 comments… read them below or add one }
I’m not a fan of 3D in general. As a guy who wears glasses, the 3D glasses quickly become awkward. Additionally, I feel like I constantly have to refocus my eyes, and I always end up with a headache.
I think you summed it up with one phrase toward the end:
And that’s why nobody likes 3D—anyone with a soul, or any taste in science fiction, would rather crawl naked through Buddhism’s Hell of Needles than watch Avatar. If that thing is the best 3D has to offer, then what, pray, is the incentive to see anything in it—since “not as good as Avatar” (terrifying thought) is already implied?
Love the suggestions, WWTW, but also like what Burton had to say about giving people choices of a 2-D or 3-D version. I opted out of Thor altogether as my local theatre the other day as they had not one but two 3-D versions in rotation and the 2-D wasn’t till a much later time.
My suggestion? It’s pretty simple.
The current models of 3d glasses polarize light, making the images on the screen darker. Step 1- if your movie is mostly set during darkness, don’t bother with converting it to 3d as you won’t be able to see anything on the screen. I’m looking at you Priest and Stranger Tides.
Step 2 – Theaters? Turn the blasted projector bulb up a bit. A lot of places will dim the bulb’s output a bit to save money. (Those bulbs use up a surprisingly large amount of energy at full power.) But when you do that with a 3d film, you got an already dark film becoming even darker. If your theater goers can’t see anything, they aren’t going to spring for the 3d again.
Christian – You might want to read John Podhoretz’ take on 3D. It makes a lot of sense to me, especially his insight on the sense of depth and perspective which current HD and large format films impart on audiences.
http://www.weeklystandard.com/articles/next-big-thing_573243.html